Solo parenting – The good, the bad and the ugly

by | May 10, 2023

For the last two and half weeks I’ve been solo parenting.  My husband has been away on a work trip, and I’ve needed to hold down the fort whilst he has been away, and I wanted to share with you what worked and what didn’t work in this journey of being a single parent.

Firstly, let me take my hat off to all the single parents out there.  The level of respect that I have for you has just grown exponentially.  Trying to do it all on your own can in some ways can be super overwhelming but in others quite liberating.

Ok, so let’s do this – what worked for me whilst hubby was away:

Running a tight ship:  I was able to run a tight ship whilst my husband was away.  One thing that you may not be aware of is that my husband is super easy going.  The phrase “she’ll be right” gets used quite often.  He’s the calm to my storm, but in this situation, I needed to run a tight ship in order for the kids to understand what I expected of them.

Routine:  It was important for the kids to understand the routine so that I could manage their expectations.

Being the only decision maker:  This made things easier because I was laying down the rules and there were no conflicting rules from my husband.

What didn’t work so well:

The loneliness:  This was a hard one.  I’ve been with my husband for 21 years, having him around all the time is natural, so not having another adult in the house was hard.  The first week was tough.

Recognising that I couldn’t do it all:  The fact that I needed to ask my mum and my mother-in-law for help at different times simply because I couldn’t be in two places at one time was just the way that it was.  For example, I couldn’t take my son to therapy and pick up my daughter from school, etc.

No time for me:  This one I really struggled with.  Part of my self-care routine is to have a bath, by myself every week.  I need to preface ‘by myself’ because I’m still at the stage where my kids would happily pile into the bath tub if I was in there and it wouldn’t matter how hot I made the water.  Not having my weekly bath really set me back.  It was the one enjoyment, the downtime that I really needed to rest my body and get my mindset right so that I would be prepared for the week to come.

This time has stretched me in ways I didn’t think was possible.  The growth has been very cool to watch, witness and partake in.  If you had of asked me a few years ago if I could have dealt with solo parenting for two weeks, I would been adamant that I couldn’t do it.  This experience has show me that I am capable of so much and so are you.

We’re often put in situations where we think we can’t manage, we can’t survive.  But reality is, when things don’t go our way, when hurdles come, we must dig deep for we in fact do have all the resources that we need, even if we don’t want to move forward, we must have the understanding that we can and that we will.

Book in a FREE 30 minute chat with me here.

Subscribe to my newsletter to ensure you don’t miss any deals or hot tips.

Join my facebook community to be with like minded mums going through the same journey as you.