The One Red Flag That I Missed
I always wanted to be a mum. For as long as I can remember, it was the dream. Looking after kids felt natural to me. People would often say, “You’re so good with kids—you’re going to be an amazing mum one day.” I’d smile, wearing those words like a badge of honour. I thought I had all the experience I needed. More training than most girls my age. Or so I believed.
But when my son was born, the reality hit hard.
Nothing felt natural.
Nothing flowed.
I was a sleep-deprived zombie with Pamela Anderson-sized boobs, drowning in the waves of postnatal anxiety.
I thought I knew kids. I thought I knew babies.
But honestly, I knew nothing.
Every challenge felt enormous. Every issue felt like it was the end of the world. That’s what happens when your nervous system is fried, your mind is spiralling, and your whole world has turned upside down.
It wasn’t until my son was around eight months old that I noticed something didn’t feel quite right.
Back then, every baby on the block seemed to have a B. Box sippy cup—it was the must-have baby accessory. You weren’t a “cool” mum if your kid didn’t have one.
So, desperate to fit in, I bought one.
I washed it, sterilised it, and handed it to my boy. He turned it over in his hands, studying it like it was a puzzle. He couldn’t figure it out. How did this thing work? Where did this thing go?
So, I showed him.
“Like this, bubby.”
I put the straw in my mouth and exaggerated a big slurp.
But he just stared at me.
Over the next few days, it became painfully clear—he had no idea how to suck from a straw.
And I couldn’t understand it.
How was this possible?
Did I really have to teach him?
How did the other kids just seem to get it?
This moment was the first sign of something I wasn’t ready to face.
It was the beginning of a pattern around challenges with his mouth.
There would be choking on food (which terrified me).
There would be resistance to brushing his teeth.
And later, struggles to form words.
But I brushed it off.
I justified it.
I told myself he just wasn’t ready yet.
I swapped the sippy cup for one he could tip and dribble water from. I made it easier. I avoided it.
Deep down, I knew it wasn’t just about the cup.
It was part of something bigger—something I couldn’t yet name. Something I wasn’t ready to accept.
If your child is struggling to use a straw, don’t ignore it like I did.
Don’t dismiss it. Don’t write it off.
It might be nothing—or it might be something worth looking into.
Reach out to a speech therapist, an occupational therapist, or your paediatrician.
Get curious. Ask the questions.
Looking back, this was one of the biggest giveaways that my son is and was autistic.
I just didn’t know it yet.
Know another mum who might need to read this? Please send it her way. Sometimes it’s the smallest signs that can mean the biggest things, and not every new mum knows to look for them.
___________________________________________________________________________________________
Podcast Episode #36: Breakthrough Behaviours Through Transformative Play with Anitha Haripersad
Anitha holds a Masters in Inclusive Education, Post Graduate in Working with Children with Autism and a diploma in Educational Leadership and Learning. Anitha is also a certified LEGO based play trainer and facilitator.
Working predominately with autistic children who have experienced trauma, Anitha offered so many gems in this weeks epidsode.
In our conversation we spoke about:
▶️ How we can interpret the phrase “All behaviour is communication”
▶️ What the 4 behaviours are that indicate anxiety
▶️ How Anitha uses a child’s own interest to motivate relationship building and pro-social learning
▶️ The benefits of LEGO Transformation Play
To listen to the podcast episode, click here.
💻 If you’re needing some extra support whilst navigating the journey of autism, please book in your free call today.
Book in a FREE call, select the time that suits you.
